Chapter Three: The Letters From No One

The letterbox at number four Privet Drive is about to get absolutely lit.

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The letterbox at number four Privet Drive is about to get absolutely lit.

As we all now know, funny business follows little old Harry Potter around. To be fair, the boy’s oblivious to the fact that he was literally dropped off at his aunt and unc’s by a half giant riding a humungous motorbike, and that might be something to do with all this weird shit that’s going on around him. If I didn’t know any better I’d say he was number 5 that was experimented on at Hawkins lab, but that would be too much of a worldly cross-over and I don’t think I’d like to see Harry go up against a god forsaken demogorgon.

Continue reading “Chapter Three: The Letters From No One”

a plea for Harry Potter-related help

If there’s two things in this world I enjoy, they are Harry Potter and boozing. Like many others (I hope), I grew up with Harry, Ron and Hermione. I waited patiently for my Hogwarts letter on my 11th birthday, I queued with countless other Muggle-borns to purchase my yearly novel, and I suffered in indignity when the time came to say goodbye following the final film.

Not one to let go of anything dear to my heart, I have since amassed a collection of four wands – two of which I lost on nights out and had to re-purchase – a Slytherin robe, six Harry Potter tattoos and countless themed paraphernalia. I like Harry Potter. Whilst on this collective journey, I have also honed a taste for cocktails of all varieties and when two loves go hand in hand it is hard to ignore the ignition of the heart.

So once again, Harry (or whoever you may be), I must ask too much of you…

Should you have a spare two minutes could you please visit my delicious Google forms page and help me with some market research? It may eventually lead to you receiving your own Hogwarts letter and infinite witchy good karma.

If you click RIGHT HERE it will take you to the form 🙂 FANKS!!!!