some more london travel angst: 2015’s new fares

So the jolly old folks over at TFL have decided that the people of London have got too much cash on their hands, so they’ve done the only decent thing they could think of and popped their prices up. What lovely people they truly are, may their lives be filled with sunshine and happiness and may they live on in trainline heaven for eternity.

What the fuck! As if living in London isn’t expensive enough, hoisting the price of a mere off-peak travelcard from eight-ninety to a staggering twelve English pounds is just an absolute pile of shite really, isn’t it Boris.

Now, TFL have released a lovely little blog post not unlike my own in temperament to say that “on average, fares have increased by 2.5%” (why thank you very much babes) and that “this helps protect current levels of reinvestment in the transport network”. No really, what the flitwick does that actually mean? A quick self-analysis would take a guess at it meaning that they’re charging us out of our arses not to pump more money into the system, which would perhaps be acceptable, but to “protect” their current improvements. That’s really not a valid reason guys is it, what you protecting it with – a solid gold layering of bubble wrap? If your improvements are current then that means they’ve been approved and financed, not that they require a price hike to go ahead.

I wonder how much of the extra money made from these glam new fares went towards the making of this gorgeous image? There’s nothing quite like a fancy visual representation of daylight robbery is there.


Now, I really wouldn’t be quite so outraged if the transport system in London wasn’t so f-ing grim. Sure, it’s very rare that you have to wait for longer than 10 mins for any mode of transport here, and that really is great, but it could be better guys couldn’t it? You’ve got no less than 8.615 million people who need to get from A to B in this city which is set to rise again this year, a few extra trains wouldn’t hurt you would it? It’s certainly not like you can’t afford it.

And how about a little spruce up of the tube trains? The Bakerloo line seats look like they’re been there since the Underground was first opened.

Perhaps we should all just take to the streets on Boris bikes, and see how TFL enjoy an influx of 8.615 million cyclists in the city; how much even is it to rent a Bozza these days? Please tell me that’s not been put up too.

Anyway, on behalf of the working, commuting, tutting and disapproving London community, I’d like to say a big cheers to TFL and hope that they throw themselves a big congrats party (with all this extra coin) to celebrate.

Anyone got a spare tenner I can lend for my travel card this month?

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