5 tips for anyone travelling to glorious Corfu

After getting stuck into The Durrells and beginning to feel all soppy for sandy Greece again I thought now may be the perfect time to pen a post about Corfu. Those more cringey people among us say that having lived in more than one place is hell or something because you leave a part of yourself there forever, regardless of how often you return. I unfortunately am not that cringey – and actually almost vomited writing that previous sentence – so I will say this: living abroad for a while is pretty fucking sweet, and in my (slightly biased) opinion Corfu is a perfect place to relocate. Continue reading “5 tips for anyone travelling to glorious Corfu”

why you should absolutely not take a gap year

Do you remember how hard you thought life was when you were at school? Do you remember when getting homework from four out of five lessons in a day was considered a crime against humanity, and after school detention really did feel like federal prison? I thought all of these things, and by the time I was 18 and the time came for me to escape 6th form and education, I decided I needed a well-earned break. By well-earned I of course mean unnecessary. Continue reading “why you should absolutely not take a gap year”

a guide to Prague

On my quest to digitally record anything remotely interesting that happened to me last year – bear in mind my memory is completely shit – I found myself reminiscing about May’s trip to Prague. As my first visit to the stag do capital of Europe I will forever look back on it not as the trip when I saw a legion of pissed up Brits abroad shaking their cocks around with a picturesque background – surprisingly we saw no genitalia – but as the very first time I went abroad and forgot my mother fucking hair straighteners. Continue reading “a guide to Prague”

how to enjoy a skiing holiday if you’re shit at skiing

January is such a wanky month, isn’t it. Winter in general for me is just not the one – all the extra layers add to the illusion that I may infact be the Michelin man, and having to toast my hands when I get home just so I can feel them again is just not ideal.

There are some (perhaps mentally instable) people among us, however, who love it. They can’t wait for the summer days of sticky tube rides and frivolous late-night sunset boozing to be over so they can get out their winter woolies and experience the joy of wrapping up against the harsh winds (weather bomb, anyone?). Continue reading “how to enjoy a skiing holiday if you’re shit at skiing”

shark attack

Long ago (about a month ago) when I promised that I had a tale to tell about the Jaws ride at Universal, I was unsure on whether or not I was really willing to share my shark attack shame with the world, as it has haunted me ever since.

This blog seems to have made me disregard all my shame, however (as you can see by the picture I posted of myself in that previous post), and so perhaps the hilarity of my shark-baiting days is Internet-worthy. Continue reading “shark attack”

how not to do amsterdam

I know I literally just told a tale of Amsterdam, but I feel that there may not be enough out there on the Internet, and believe it or not, eating banana out of a sex performer is probably not the funniest thing to happen to me in the Netherlands.

I seem to like going to Amsterdam. A good European jaunt is always required, and I do try and make it to Europe at least once a year to escape England without too much effort, mainly heading out with the aforementioned pal with whom I went to Berlin (and we totally got into Berghain…). Continue reading “how not to do amsterdam”

some more london travel angst: 2015’s new fares

So the jolly old folks over at TFL have decided that the people of London have got too much cash on their hands, so they’ve done the only decent thing they could think of and popped their prices up. What lovely people they truly are, may their lives be filled with sunshine and happiness and may they live on in trainline heaven for eternity.

What the fuck! As if living in London isn’t expensive enough, hoisting the price of a mere off-peak travelcard from eight-ninety to a staggering twelve English pounds is just an absolute pile of shite really, isn’t it Boris. Continue reading “some more london travel angst: 2015’s new fares”

getting fruity on new year’s eve

So tomorrow is the last day of 2014, and it’s time to gear up for all of the ‘new year, new me’ statuses. I know I might seem a bit down on the old status writers at present but positivity never made for a good read in my experience.

Anyway, tomorrow marks New Year’s Eve, a time for spending extortionate amounts of money on champers and getting bevvied up to ring in 2015, and it’s set to be pretty sweet. Being from a small city where everyone does the same thing week in week out in the same places, I’ve been used to standing around outside on NYE, waiting for a mis-timed countdown to let us all know it’s time to hug and smooch anyone and everyone in sight, to then realise that it is, in fact, still only 11.57. Continue reading “getting fruity on new year’s eve”

berghain says nein: a guide to berlin

When you go your separate ways from your childhood bezzie for university, it can go one of two ways: you could savour that close bond and talk all day e’rryday over Skype and Whatsapp, or you could become the shittest friends ever who see each other once a year. My most fave homie on the planet and I went our separate ways nearly five years ago, when he went off to pursue dentistry in the far corners of the universe (Newcastle), and as we’re pretty shit at being in contact with each other, we only reunite once in about eight blue moons (love you Ash hun). Continue reading “berghain says nein: a guide to berlin”

the unofficial rules of london underground

So somehow we’ve reached mid-December, although I swear last week it was the beginning of October. Alas, it seems to be true that the older you get, the faster time goes (and I’m only 23 so it must be a blur to anyone over 30). So far this month, we’ve gotten excited by the war of the Christmas adverts (I’m team Sainsbury’s), we’ve marvelled at all the festive lights flying up around the country, and we’ve drank copious amounts of mulled alcohol (it’s Christmas after all, rude not to really). What I’m trying to say is that the festive spirit is in full swing; Santa Claus is coming to town in less than two weeks! Continue reading “the unofficial rules of london underground”