how to be the best Instagrammer you can be

Looking good and shoving it in other people’s faces is great, and it’s made increasingly greater (and easier) by every Millennial’s favourite app: Instagram. Pretending you’re someone else online is an art form, and one that I’ve discussed as recently as last week on my blog. Seen as though I am unoriginal as fuck and unable to come up with anything interesting to talk about, I’ve decided to take this nastiness and direct it at Instagram’s finest, having embraced the fact I hate everything.

Getting any amount of attention on Instagram is somewhat difficult for anyone who isn’t the size of a Bowtruckle with a “glam squad” on the payroll. Convincing other people that your life is worthy of a double-tap can be hard; I am nearing 450 followers (groundbreaking, I know) and am yet to surpass the 15 likes mark on most of my pictures which is of course preposterous. But that doesn’t mean I don’t know the secret to a successful life on the ‘gram. Continue reading “how to be the best Instagrammer you can be”

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a blog post about blogging

So it has come to my attention that I’ve been completely neglecting my blog. Like if this blog was a child I would be sent down for gross neglect and/or murder as I’ve paid absolutely fuck all attention to it in almost three months. My last blog entry was – of course – thrilling and hilarious, and yet i still find myself here in 2016 having failed to pen a follow up. How dare I deprive all my hundreds of thousands of avid readers??? Side note: I do not in any way have hundreds of thousands of readers – avid or otherwise. Sob. Continue reading “a blog post about blogging”